I believe, right to my core, that energy is everything and everything is energy, so not wanting any expectations put on me by anyone else or by myself, I got just that and went in to our wedding day completley expectation less. And if there was one word to describe not having any expectations of the day or put on me by others, it would be; divine. I wasn’t worried about how I was meant to be feeling, or if what I WAS feeling was normal and every moment and emotion was just met with love and calm.
And here is some of those emotions put pen to paper for you…
Morgan & I had our final moments together the night before and spoke of love and life and what marriage meant to us and more (some things are meant to remain sacred after all). He was then kicked out in to another suite on the estate and my best friend and soul sister Peta moved in to the room.
Waking up, at 5:30am, I will never forget turning to see if PK was awake to see her lying there with the biggest smile on her face who immediately started to pour love and excitement. “Can you believe TODAY is the day ” ..”its here” “the day of all days” “YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED” “MARRRIEEDDDDDD ANNA”!!!!!… we jumped around and squealed for awhile before I went out in solitude to the balcony of our room to watch the sunrise. None of it was planned. I had never intended to be up to watch the sunrise but I have to say being up for that last sunrise as a fiancé and not a wife was the most peaceful, beautiful, surreal start to my day ever.
All the bridesmaids then joined me at our suite for some squeals and hugs and tears. We were all emotional before 6:30am and I couldn’t have loved it anymore. They left me to journal sitting in solitude on the balcony and sitting there, overlooking the ocean as the sun continued to rise is something I’ll remember for ever. It’s these moments I’ll remember amongst the hours that followed. The quiet ones, the contemplative ones.
Today is the day I get to marry the love of my life and my best friend and there is no feeling to describe it. I am sitting on my private balcony watching and listening to the waves crash and watching the sun rise slowly in the sky and I feel a sense of calm and bliss like never before. To me, marrying Morgan is the most natural thing in the whole world so the feelings are all centred.
I am calm. I am totally in love. I am ready.
Morgan has taught me the meaning of true love. That we don’t need each other, but we want each other, and that we have never been two halves to complete a whole, but rather worked on ourselves to become whole whilst being united as two.
This morning as I sit on the ocean in the sun, full from love, I feel at peace. Like my soul has truly founds its missing half and it’s home. Today I am his, and he is mine, and it is now so for infinite eternity.
…… (a small snippet from my journalling the morning of the wedding)
When we were ready we made our way in to the beautiful open planned living area that was overlooking the infinity pool and ocean and had our fresh breakfast whipped up by our chef whilst the first bottles of Moet & Verve for the day were popped. I just remember laughing, lots and lots and lots of laughing and “can you believe its here” moments. At this stage the sentiment of the day was already echoed several times that “you are so CALM how are you so calm” – and I was, because as I had journalled that morning, to me, this was just the most natural thing in the whole world.
Once we were done with breakfast the girls moved all their things up in to my suite for the day where we would be getting ready and I went for a swim – one thing I remember about the whole day is the energy, I did whatever I was called to do in any given moment and to me I think it’s what made the whole day more relaxing, fun and calm.
At this stage, Morgan was still downstairs in the estate waiting for the boys to come, relaxing by himself – and word had gotten to me HE was a little nervous!! As soon as his groomsmen arrived the nerves seemed to disappear and they got to kick start their day with swimming and beers and relaxing too.
The rest of the day went by as any normal wedding day would. Make up, hair, boys getting ready probably 20 minutes before they had to as guys rock at getting ready way way more efficiently than girls! I remember saying to the make up artist & my beautiful girlfriend Emma who did our wedding hair, that I wanted everyone to be done by 3:30pm (ceremony was at 4:30pm) as I just wanted that hour to relax. To soak it in. To not be rushed. To just be calm and gather my energy and focus on intentions. And at 3:30pm on the dot my dress was getting zipped up and we were popping one of the last bottles of Verve before we headed out for the Ceremony.
I still get goosebumps and butterflies thinking back to that day before the ‘wedding’ officially kicked off. All those special moments with my bridesmaids, my sister, my mum and my niece. The laughter, dancing, high fives, more laughter, tears, intention setting and did I mention laughter?
One beautiful thing I will remember forever was something my best friend Peta did with me. Every hour or so she would stop me, take both my hands look me in the eye and ask me what I was feeling in that moment, and what was my intention for that moment. It could have been to feel the emotion, at one time it was to remember every second, another hour it was to soak up the memories, but it was that critical role she played, in helping me set and connect to intentions is what I believe made me so calm and more crucially, made the day go s.l.o.w. So many people said to me that “your day goes so fast you won’t know where the time has gone” but I honestly, truly had the opposite experience because my intention was for the day to go slow and to soak up every second of every minute of every hour.
You see I’m here to dispel some myths brides to be so get ready to have your world rocked.
Your day doesn’t “go by in a flash” – its as if time stands still and you can see everything in slow motion. All of it.
Your day isn’t stressful and rushed – its calm, beautiful, intentional and as divine as you intend for it to be.
You don’t have to “not get too drunk” – enjoy that champagne, toast every moment and know every sip is worth it.
And nothing goes wrong. Nothing. Your day will truly be as magical and fairytale as you imagined it to be because even tiny mishaps don’t matter when all that does is that you walk down the end of that aisle to the man you’re promising your forever to.
I will never forget Belinda, our wedding planner coming in to the suite and saying, ‘ok are you ready? It’s time to get married’ … it all still feels like slow motion, walking out with the girls, my niece and mum, lining up, keeping my Great Uncle calm – who walked me down the aisle – and laughing with the girls as they were getting ready to walk before me as my best friends and soul sisters, and then…. and then, the music started.
I still get emotional writing this now thinking about the song and feelings at that moment.
That is where this post ends though and Part 3 begins with ‘The Ceremony’ and I’ll share all the moments, photos and feelings from that sacred extraordinary part of the day.