Go to school. Get good grades. (Try to) qualify for university. Get a HECS debt. Get a job. Work hard your whole life. Keep up with the Joneses. Work harder. Take 4 weeks of holiday a year (if that). Get married. Have kids. Over leverage. Argue over money. Possibly divorce over said arguments over money. Retire old. THEN start living?
FUCK.THAT.
I can’t recall the exact moment in my life I always knew I was going to buck conventional thinking but I do know it happened quite young.
I vividly remember being in high school in Year 10 though having been a straight A student (a rebel with partying – but always a straight A student) and sitting with a course counsellor trying to work out “what I was going to do in my future” and thinking, how the hell do I know what I want to do with my future at just 15?? All teachers were encouraging me to do Tertiary exams in subjects like law, history, hard maths and high English – and I remembmer not just thinking, but TELLING them – I could think of nothing worse!!!! My heart was calling me in to the subjects that I figured I would actually use after school, like Tourism, Work Studies and believe it or not – cooking!!
I went home and chatted to mum. I told her I didn’t know what I wanted to do specifically (although I STILL was saying “I’m going to own a hotel” at this stage) – but I did know that I would always strive to do my best and I would be successful no matter what.
She told me tertiary education or not – even if all my friends did it and all my teachers encouraged me to do it because of my grades – she would support me 100% in whatever decision I did make and be proud of me regardless (best mum EVER right?)
I chose the non conventional route – a straight A intelligent kid bucked the trend of exams and stress at 16 and 17 years of age and went with non T.E.E subjects instead. I did things that my heart told me to do – Tourism (I had a love of travel very young it would seem), Work Studies, Dancing (I have always loved to dance and be creative), Craft, Cooking, English – NO MATHS (yep, I dropped maths year 11 and 12 – STILL think it’s the best decision I ever made), and work placememt – I wanted to get out in the big bad world and I wanted to do it young.
Years 11 & 12 passed and I excelled. Whilst all my friends were in tears and developing stomach ulcers (yep, a few kids in my high school were that stressed from exams they got very sick) I had the best 2 years of high school life. I still maintained straight A’s – got DUX of year 11 (for non tertiary) and actually got top student of Western Australia in Work Studies.
I finished high school and rebelled again. Whilst many if not most kids were applying for universities and TAFE’s – I was studying world maps and figuring out where I wanted to go and spend a gap year.
Again, my teachers were concerned – even my incredible Year Co-ordinator got involved and sat me down and told me the smartest thing I could do was go on to continue my studies.
I rebelled against that notion though. I knew I didn’t want to be a Dr or a Lawyer at this stage so what was the rush to go and kill my creativity so young in a uni or TAFE?
Fast forward to 18 years of age and taking off to the U.K with my best friend (thanks to a generous gift of a one way ticket from said best friend Najettes mum Lynne) and $300 dollars to my name – but with an adventurous spirit that had just began it’s life journey of living on purpose. I didn’t have a visa, nor a job but we DID have somewhere to stay – and the first week, Naj and I went bar to bar asking for a job. She was underage – HA, and I didn’t even have a visa – Double HA … but within 2 days, we landed our first job in a small Scottish country town in one of the local pubs.
That was a months and months long adventure I will never forget and it gave me my first taste of a) doing whatever it takes to look after myself and b) travel.
Coming home I got my first full time job in an amazing Accounting firm. I was 18 years old, living out of home by myself earning a whopping (I joke) $20,000 a year. That eternal pull of … this is NOT the way I want to live my entire life was starting to pull on me again however.
By 19, I felt like my vocabulary was not where I wanted it to be (true story) and I wanted to challenge myself again, so I took a SAT test to get in to Uni as a – get this – mature age student (at 19!! Haha) and successfully started my Bachelor of Commerce double majoring in Human Resource Management and Management, with a minor in Entrepreneurship at Murdoch University.
The following 3 years I worked full time and studied full time and that is when I wound up in Federal Politics. I graduated being offered honours (fuckkk thattttttt I thought, MORE study?? FOR WHAT!!! – aka I politely and respectfully said ‘thank you Murdoch but noooo thank you) and continued my career in federal politics.
By societal standards. I had “made it”. I was 24 years of age, earning approx. $90,000 a year in Politics , I had finished high school successfully, graduated uni with a degree successfully, I was madly in to personal development ….
But I still wasn’t fulfilled.
There was a MASSIVE in congruency between what I wanted to do (which I still couldn’t work out) and what I was doing.
I left politics to go pursue a career in the private sector – thinking maybe THIS was the thing. I didn’t take a pay cut (at least one thing was for sure I was young but I absolutely knew my worth – LEARN that lesson alone from this post and you’ll have success) as a Business Development Manager (BDM) in a Mining Services Company.
I’ll never forget my old (incredible) boss in federal politics though handing me a book on my last day wishing me all the best. I opened the book – “The 4 hour work week” – when I got home (little did he know I had read the book 3 years earlier at 21) and saw his lovely inscription.
There was lots of lovely well wishes – and then at the very bottom – 7 words which struck something inside of me that to this day, still give me Goosebumps.
“Go and find what you’re looking for” …
I realized that was the in-congruency – I was living the life I didn’t want to live. EVEN THOUGH I was successful by almost all of societal standards.
I was so not ok with the traditional 40 hours a week (but really it’s 50+), for 50 years, to retire at 70 then not even be well enough to truly enjoy life. Then die.
I was not ok with being a young couple who’s soul focus was to settle down, buy a house the bank ultimately owned anyway, get married, have kids… then argue about how stressed we were over money.
Again – to that I say fuck.that.
I spent a year in that role as BDM before I found some health products my body desperately needed from the stress I was under – that happened to be attached to a profession I had heard nothing about – network marketing – that I fell madly, deeply and passionately in love with.
I won’t say the rest is history, as it’s not, I am only just getting started, but I won’t bore you with the story here as you can read about what happened next on that journey in this post.
What I will say is …
I found what I was looking for.
I found the vehicle that was going to get me out of the rat race of working my whole life to try to live in the moments I got given when approval from a boss was given.
I found the vehicle that was going to allow me financial freedom to choose if I did want to invest money in property, I could be able to ENJOY that property as I stay at home working on my business –not tied to a 9-5 office job.
I found the vehicle that allowed me to be location independent – the greatest gift of all I believe.
This article isn’t about network marketing though. Far from it. It’s about waking you up to the fact that your own life doesn’t have to be the norm of working your entire life towards a goal that you maybe don’t even want.
What do I mean by that?
This.
Go to school. Get good grades. (Try to) qualify for university. Get a HECS debt. Get a job. Work hard your whole life. Keep up with the Joneses. Work harder. Take 4 weeks of holiday a year (if that). Get married. Have kids. Over leverage. Argue over money. Possibly divorce over said arguments over money. Retire old. THEN start living?
If that is what makes you happy, then AWESOME, do more of that – and do it with all the joy and gusto you can muster. And I sincerely am cheering you on.
But I can guarantee you, for most people, that isn’t at all what their heart desires and yet somewhere along the line, they’ve accepted that as ok, as the norm, like, it’s ok to work Monday to Friday 8am – 6pm wishing your life away for the weekends then being too tired to reallyyyy LIVE and pursue your passions on the weekend anyway.
NO WAY.
THAT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE YOUR NORMAL. NO ONE IS DESTINED FOR THAT LIFE IF THEY DON’T WANT IT TO BE.
Jim Hightower once so brilliantly and wisely stated, “The opposite of courage is not cowardice, it’s conformity”. If you have happily but intentionally chosen a life of ‘just getting by’ and living to pay the bills and get a good job, own a nice home and work until you’re 70 – that’s totally ok, as long as you’re HAPPY and conscious about that decision. As long as you haven’t accidently chosen conformity.
If you have just unconsciously accepted this as normal though and you’re not happy then re evaluate – look at ways to live more in to the life you want and deserve and go out there and pursue THAT.
As I said, this post isn’t about network marketing – nor is it about quitting your job living off baked beans and failing forward in entrepreneurship. Because most people aren’t in fact cut out to be entrepreneurs or successful in building a biz in network marketing, I wish they were but it’d be remiss of me to say anything other than the truth.
It IS about finding out what you REALLY want to do in this life and aligning yourself to your passion and values however.
Maybe that might mean not driving in the car the bank owns to impress your mates to instead drive an older less expensive car to have some more money to put in the bank to get some savings to invest in something that can earn you passive income in years to come.
Maybe that might mean downsizing your house or not filling it with all the 2.0 things to keep up a facade when the bank is the one who again, really owns it anyway to be able to have more money left over at the end of every pay to start saving for the big 6 month Europe trip you really want to take.
Maybe it might mean dropping down to part time hours (IF you can afford that because you haven’t over leveraged yourself) to take 2 days off either end of the weekend to do what you LOVE for 4 days of the week instead of JUST the weekend. Hell, even dropping down to 4 days of work to have 3 days including the weekend. (It IS Possible – anything is possible).
Or maybe it DOES mean network marketing or become an entrepreneur is something you need to look at to earn extra money to pursue the adventures of life that set your soul most on fire.
As the amazing Jack Delosa says – Your life’s work is a representation of who you are.
You weren’t born to work in a job that doesn’t totally light you up, be in debt most of your life, retire old – and die with a life unlived still inside of you.
The #1 regret of the dying is … and I quote;
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me”.
Just let that sink in for a minute. Or 5.
The #1 regret of the dying is to have lived a life TRUE to themselves …
I live by this principle personally (it’s why I pursued network marketing in my extraordinary company with such gusto and passion) – and recently when talking to a successful gentleman in a bar (I thought I recognized him from somewhere so stopped him) in his late 50’s when I asked what excited him he looked at me like I had just punched him in the face – with total and utter shock.
Here was a wildly successful civil engineer being asked by this loud fun loving random 28 year old woman who he had just met “what excited him” – but the saddest part … was the shocked look was because he said no one had ever asked him that before.
His wife came over and I brought her up to speed on Morgan and I’s and her husbands conversation and she said “nothing excites him, he loves his work” –
Turns out she couldn’t have been more wrong. He looked me dead in the eye, and told me “Travel. I want to travel. I want nothing more than to pack a suitcase and go and explore the world.” Now it was the wife’s turn to look like someone had slapped her in the face.
I told him he should go do that. He told me he couldn’t. I asked him why… he told me and I quote this verbatim..
“ I can’t because we need the money – we have a beautiful house in the best suburb that I never even get to enjoy because I work so damn hard, our 2 kids are in private school education because well, that’s the suburb we live in and my wife wanted them too, we have to have friends over on the weekends and only eat the best steak to keep up with the joneses and both drive nice cars”
He told me it looks like he’ll have to do that for the rest of his life, and I am quoting here – “then be lucky enough to die” … be LUCKY enough to die. He is so engrained in the rat race that he is literally living to die. A man who again by societal standards would be one of the most successful around – married for 20+ years, 2 educated children, great house, nice cars, wildly successful career – is living to die.
That is obviously an extreme case – but don’t be so naïve to believe that you wont work yourself in to the same position if you keep living the life that others expect of you – your family, boss, partner, society – instead of living the life you wish you had the COURAGE to live.
I’m not here to tell you what to do (ever), or even give you steps today like “5 steps to living a life you wish you had the courage to” .. No. It goes much deeper than that and no 5 steps is going to get you anywhere.
I am merely here to challenge you to take a look in to your life right now (I mean literally, right now) and ask yourself is this the life you truly want to be living or is this one that has happened by blind autopilot because you think it’s what you SHOULD do (get the house, cars, have the kids – and work until you die). Because I’m just here to also tell you it doesn’t HAVE to be that way.
I’m an ambassador for happiness and believe part of my purpose in life is to be here to shake up mediocrity and help people realise they’re destined for greatness, even if that greatness for you looks like more travel, more purposeful living and less arguments in a household due to less financial pressure.
In this moment, whether you’re on the train coming to or from work, or at your desk at work, or maybe scrolling reading this on your phone over the weekend – just take an honest look at your life right now – and do a stock take on if it’s where you want to be. If it’s not, that’s ok, the most powerful way to live is to live consciously, so at the very least you have taken the first steps towards living with more awareness.
Now I want you to have a think about where you would HONESTLY love to be in 5 years time.
Travelling more?
Maybe with a kid or a few kids but not having to stress over money.
Mortgage free?
Working from a laptop around the world?
Having your own business?
Ok good – thinking?? If you DON’T know where you specifically want to be, just think about what would be something you would love to DO … go and spend 3 months in Rome learning to cook and speak the language? Or maybe take the train route through the Alaskan mountains? Or maybe it’s just to cut down to 3 days of work a week.
Got it? If you haven’t stop. Right now. Look away, even just for a few minutes and THINK. You do not have to be ok or accept the life you already have. It’s bullshit and telling if you unconsciously or consciously have but don’t believe you can still drastically change it – because you CAN.
Have you got a picture now?
Ok great. So you have even a slight idea of what we want to be doing in 5 years or at least something you would love to do as a smaller aspect of our life.
NOW … I want you to think if what you’re doing today, like right now, look around you THIS SECOND – is going to get you closer to that.
Are you not over leveraged struggling week to week?
Are you not stuck in a job that you hate wishing you weren’t there?
Are you making healthy choices to get your body ready for children?
If the answer is no, what you’re doing today or this week, or for the next month isn’t going to get you closer to where you want to be in 5 years then CHANGE WHAT YOU’RE DOING.
I love the quote – you are not a tree –MOVE.
Life is yours – to live as loudly and brightly and wildly and spontaneously and magically and divinely and beautifully and successfully and gloriously as you please.
It’s just a choice – but it’s a series of lots of little choices that you are making every single day that leads you to your future – and it’s a series of lots of little choices you have made to have lead you to where you are now. (That might have hit you somewhere and hurt but guess what, the truth is always going to piss you off before it sets you free).
So choose better. Be conscious of your decisions from today forward and just remember – you weren’t born to wait to die, living a life of mediocrity in the meantime complying to societal norms.
You get to choose your life – and I hope today, you start to choose better.
As always, I am cheering you on the loudest.
Anna xo
) .. The advice I have though is just try it, quietly at first if you have to, get the results I KNOW you will get, and then go from there. But just know if that friend doesn’t support your decisions that you’re making to improve your health and lifestyle then it’s time to re think who you’ve allowed in your life. The other thing is, you will gain a hundred new friends who WILL support you & have your back with our extraordinary team of humans all there to cheer you on. So just know, NOT doing it because of that is going to get you nowhere but feeling the fear and doing it anyway – is going to get you EVERYWHERE.
