A+M Get Married; Part 4

So if there is one thing Morgan and I love more than anything, it’s not just a party, but a party with our nearest and dearest and what better excuse to have the biggest most extraordinary party of your life – than at your wedding?

The reception was big for us and there was one theme that we said was our biggest priority to our planners and one theme only and that was – DANCING (and of course, fun!)

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Wanting to not waste a minute as party with our guests for as long as we could – you only get one night after all right – we gave ourselves one hour for photos, yep, ONE hour, so we figured if we didn’t get the shots, too bad, we’d remember the day and night through our video and memories anyway. The party and love and being amongst all of our nearest and dearest was our biggest priority (the good news is we still got the shots in the 1 hour!).

Coming back from photos we were announced in to the reception (our divine bridal party first of course) with a song we both loved since we were kids….‘Space Jam – let’s get ready to rumble song’. To refresh your memory and to prove it’s worthiness of a bridal announcement song the lyrics go;

Ladies and Gentleman, introducing the main event…. 

LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEEEEE. 

Cue epic, epic, tunes

I know, I know, best song choice ever.

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Food and booze were served and one thing I will say about a Bali wedding is the service can’t be faltered. As you finished your champagne or cocktail, the waiters had the next one at your table ready to be served.

One of the highlights of a wedding for me is always; the speeches, and our day was no different, when I think back on the day or namely, the reception, I DO remember the fireworks, the dancing and the FUN (my god the fun) but I remember the tears and laughter from the words shared from those who amazingly gave a speech. We had my mum Jenny, Morgans dad Aronn, the best man Joff, and both Morgan AND I did (I was never going to be the bride who sat silently at her wedding!) What I will share from the speeches was a quote I finished on by Steve Maraboli called Soul mates, a quote that when I first stumbled upon it years and years ago, I knew it was the words I would read to Morgan on our wedding night …

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When we are born, the soul we are given is split apart and half of it is given to someone else. Throughout our lives, we search for the person with the other half of our soul. Very few ever succeed. 

I am blessed that we have met. In a sudden moment, warm within your loving glare, my soul said, “At last! I can rest. I have fond my missing half” 

When this happens, it is said we have found our soul mate. We are happy and at peace. When we shared ourselves, we were engulfed in eternity, dancing in a timeless universe. I am truly blessed because that day, my heart recognized you as part of its own. 

Thank you for blessing ME with YOU. Thank you for dreaming with me. For seeing the same future as I do. For your beautiful eyes, soul and essence, reminding me of the truest bliss in life. I am forever grateful for you. 

I will spend an eternity loving you, caring for you, respecting you, showing you every day that I hold you as high as the stars. 

We were called up to cut the cake with all eyes on us and I remember looking at Morgan and saying “none of this feels real it truly is a fairytale”. Our first dance immediately followed our cake cutting and we floated across the dance floor to “Sam Smith – Latch (Acoustic)” – when we both heard the song sitting at home one night we looked at each other and BOTH said – “this is it!” With lyrics like the following though how could we not have?

You lift my heart up when the rest of me is down

You, you enchant me even when you’re not around

If there are boundaries, I will try to knock them down

I’m latching on, babe, now I know what I have found

Now I’ve got you in my space

I won’t let go of you

Got you shackled in my embrace

I’m latching on to you

I’m so en-captured, got me wrapped up in your touch

Feel so enamored, hold me tight within your clutch

How do you do it? You got me losing every breath

What did you give me to make my heart bleed out my chest

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Morgan and I didn’t feel we wanted to go to dance rehearsals or practice how we’d dance on the night, we love to have fun, and we always love to be in each others embrace so we knew whatever came out on the night would be ok, and I have to say, watching back the wedding video, the dance was some of my most intimate memories of he & I that day and night.

As soon as our song had finished and ALL of our guests were on the dance floor (encouraged by our wedding planners knowing what was coming next) all the lights and music were cut out like we had a “black out” for guests to think ‘oh no’ … but within seconds, the first BOOM went off and the fireworks were lighting up the sky. I remember the squeals and screams and woo’s from the guests and writing this out I have tears again as all the feelings flood back.

The rest of the night felt like it went on forever in the best way possible.

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We danced, we drank our signature cocktails and champagne and we laughed – but my god did we dance, and dance, and dance. Morgan & I’s main goal of the whole night once all the formalities were over as I said, was to have everyone on the dancefloor, and I remember our wedding planning stealing us away, telling us to turn back around to take it all in, and I started squealing with joy as I realized every single guests was on the dance floor dancing their heart out.

And the rest, as they say .. is history. Between the dancing, and the laughter and the hugs and the .. dancing – we literally had the time of our lives, the best party of our lives and the best night of our lives.

I want to leave our wedding series with some words we wrote to our beautiful wedding celebrant when she asked us two questions that we absolutely loved talking about together then writing together – and they were ‘What the relationship and marriage means to us” and “what are our hopes for the future together”

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I believe there is nothing stronger or more bonding than the written word, so I share this with you today to be held accountable to a love that I know will last the ages, and every life thereafter…

To Love…

What the relationship & marriage means to you? 

A marriage to us, is the highest form of commitment to each other, a binding of forever and infinite love in which two people hold space for one another, to grow, heal, learn, laugh, love unconditionally  

Marriage is when two come together and invite the highest good to be revealed through them and in them, so that together they can powerfully serve the world more love and light.  

What your hopes are for the future together? 

To grow more and more in love as each year passes. To have a marriage built on a foundation of love, trust, fun and adventure and for all of those areas to only strengthen and develop as we grow old together. To keep a home that is full of love and safety. To raise our children to know true love. To be each others best friends right till the end. And to grow old and grey surrounded by children and grandchildren and family who all have an abundance of love and happiness.  

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A+M get married: Emotions of the day (Part 2)

I believe, right to my core, that energy is everything and everything is energy, so not wanting any expectations put on me by anyone else or by myself, I got just that and went in to our wedding day completley expectation less. And if there was one word to describe not having any expectations of the day or put on me by others, it would be; divine. I wasn’t worried about how I was meant to be feeling, or if what I WAS feeling was normal and every moment and emotion was just met with love and calm.

And here is some of those emotions put pen to paper for you…

Morgan & I had our final moments together the night before and spoke of love and life and what marriage meant to us and more (some things are meant to remain sacred after all). He was then kicked out in to another suite on the estate and my best friend and soul sister Peta moved in to the room.

Waking up, at 5:30am, I will never forget turning to see if PK was awake to see her lying there with the biggest smile on her face who immediately started to pour love and excitement. “Can you believe TODAY is the day ” ..”its here” “the day of all days” “YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED” “MARRRIEEDDDDDD ANNA”!!!!!… we jumped around and squealed for awhile before I went out in solitude to the balcony of our room to watch the sunrise. None of it was planned. I had never intended to be up to watch the sunrise but I have to say being up for that last sunrise as a fiancé and not a wife was the most peaceful, beautiful, surreal start to my day ever.

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All the bridesmaids then joined me at our suite for some squeals and hugs and tears. We were all emotional before 6:30am and I couldn’t have loved it anymore. They left me to journal sitting in solitude on the balcony and sitting there, overlooking the ocean as the sun continued to rise is something I’ll remember for ever. It’s these moments I’ll remember amongst the hours that followed. The quiet ones, the contemplative ones.

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“Dear universe, 

Today is the day I get to marry the love of my life and my best friend and there is no feeling to describe it. I am sitting on my private balcony watching and listening to the waves crash and watching the sun rise slowly in the sky and I feel a sense of calm and bliss like never before. To me, marrying Morgan is the most natural thing in the whole world so the feelings are all centred. 

I am calm. I am totally in love. I am ready. 

Morgan has taught me the meaning of true love. That we don’t need each other, but we want each other, and that we have never been two halves to complete a whole, but rather worked on ourselves to become whole whilst being united as two. 

This morning as I sit on the ocean in the sun, full from love, I feel at peace. Like my soul has truly founds its missing half and it’s home. Today I am his, and he is mine, and it is now so for infinite eternity. 

…… (a small snippet from my journalling the morning of the wedding) 

When we were ready we made our way in to the beautiful open planned living area that was overlooking the infinity pool and ocean and had our fresh breakfast whipped up by our chef whilst the first bottles of Moet & Verve for the day were popped. I just remember laughing, lots and lots and lots of laughing and “can you believe its here” moments. At this stage the sentiment of the day was already echoed several times that “you are so CALM how are you so calm” – and I was, because as I had journalled that morning, to me, this was just the most natural thing in the whole world.

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Once we were done with breakfast the girls moved all their things up in to my suite for the day where we would be getting ready and I went for a swim – one thing I remember about the whole day is the energy, I did whatever I was called to do in any given moment and to me I think it’s what made the whole day more relaxing, fun and calm.

At this stage, Morgan was still downstairs in the estate waiting for the boys to come, relaxing by himself – and word had gotten to me HE was a little nervous!! As soon as his groomsmen arrived the nerves seemed to disappear and they got to kick start their day with swimming and beers and relaxing too.

The rest of the day went by as any normal wedding day would. Make up, hair, boys getting ready probably 20 minutes before they had to as guys rock at getting ready way way more efficiently than girls! I remember saying to the make up artist & my beautiful girlfriend Emma who did our wedding hair, that I wanted everyone to be done by 3:30pm (ceremony was at 4:30pm) as I just wanted that hour to relax. To soak it in. To not be rushed. To just be calm and gather my energy and focus on intentions. And at 3:30pm on the dot my dress was getting zipped up and we were popping one of the last bottles of Verve before we headed out for the Ceremony.

I still get goosebumps and butterflies thinking back to that day before the ‘wedding’ officially kicked off. All those special moments with my bridesmaids, my sister, my mum and my niece. The laughter, dancing, high fives, more laughter, tears, intention setting and did I mention laughter?

One beautiful thing I will remember forever was something my best friend Peta did with me. Every hour or so she would stop me, take both my hands look me in the eye and ask me what I was feeling in that moment, and what was my intention for that moment. It could have been to feel the emotion, at one time it was to remember every second, another hour it was to soak up the memories, but it was that critical role she played, in helping me set and connect to intentions is what I believe made me so calm and more crucially, made the day go s.l.o.w. So many people said to me that “your day goes so fast you won’t know where the time has gone” but I honestly, truly had the opposite experience because my intention was for the day to go slow and to soak up every second of every minute of every hour.

You see I’m here to dispel some myths brides to be so get ready to have your world rocked.

Your day doesn’t “go by in a flash” – its as if time stands still and you can see everything in slow motion. All of it.

Your day isn’t stressful and rushed – its calm, beautiful, intentional and as divine as you intend for it to be.

You don’t have to “not get too drunk” – enjoy that champagne, toast every moment and know every sip is worth it.

And nothing goes wrong. Nothing. Your day will truly be as magical and fairytale as you imagined it to be because even tiny mishaps don’t matter when all that does is that you walk down the end of that aisle to the man you’re promising your forever to.

I will never forget Belinda, our wedding planner coming in to the suite and saying, ‘ok are you ready? It’s time to get married’ … it all still feels like slow motion, walking out with the girls, my niece and mum, lining up, keeping my Great Uncle calm – who walked me down the aisle – and laughing with the girls as they were getting ready to walk before me as my best friends and soul sisters, and then…. and then, the music started.

I still get emotional writing this now thinking about the song and feelings at that moment.

That is where this post ends though and Part 3 begins with ‘The Ceremony’ and I’ll share all the moments, photos and feelings from that sacred extraordinary part of the day.

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A+M get married: Love & intentions (Part 1)

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October 17th 2014. 17th tenth two thousand and fourteen. 17/10/14.

No matter how it’s written or pronounced, October 17th 2014 was the most magical day of my life – the day I became we and my ‘partner’ became my husband.

I sit here some months later writing this simply because it has taken me this amount of time for it to all sink in, up until now, the day still seemed like a dream – something we were separate from, out of body almost. Like we were there in a big fairytale, a part of a love story unfolding, and yet it was our love story. That love story and day feels real now. We are remembering laughs, looks, smiles, feelings and remembering they were ours – we were the ones there experiencing that.

I still have moments every few days where a song from the wedding will come on in the car and I can’t stop the tears rolling down my face, sometimes gentle sobs from total and utter feelings of love, there have been many moments people in cars beside me at the lights look at me with a look of “oh you poor thing I hope you’re ok” and I try to give them the look back, the one where I’m saying “it’s ok I’m just remembering the happiest, most beautiful, most surreal day of my life.”

I like to think if I could have bottled the feelings of love up on that day, right from the moment of waking up, to when our heads hit the pillow (& really continuing on in to the next day) and we gave those bottles of love away, no one in this big beautiful world would ever go without love ever again.

I truly mean it when I say it was that beautiful.

And here is where I think is a divine time to bring in the first part of a 7 part wedding series … WHY it was truly that beautiful and HOW we had the most beautiful day of our lives. Completely stress free. Magical. Intentional. Divine.

Before I share with you every intimate detail from the day I want to share with you something much much bigger….something much more deeply and divinely important.

Our INTENTIONS behind the ‘biggest day of our lives’

You see, before we even made the tiniest of plans relating to ANY aspect of the wedding – we set an intention not just for the wedding, but for our marriage. Something I believe many people ‘skip’ or ‘miss’ these days.

When I was a little girl, my extraordinary supermum brought me up with the belief that “although your wedding day IS the most important day of your life sweeties, please don’t ever forget the ‘forever’ after it…your marriage. Focus on your MARRIAGE, not the wedding, and the wedding will fall in to place

As a little girl I remember vividly biting back (with love), laughing, telling mum “please!!!!! My wedding is going to be so big and beautiful Australia will declare it a public holiday forever more” – I’m not even actually kidding! Clearly I was always a big dreamer!

Funny thing is, I never forgot her advice, and as I grew up and in to love, I realized she might have just been right. So when Morgan asked the most honourable question of all time “will you make me the luckiest man on earth and be my wife” … I knew from that day forward my intention and focus was to be on the marriage to come, and not the wedding.

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We talked of how we would raise our children. What values would we instill in them? What rules would we have as non negotiable in our lives? How did we commit to grow independently still continuing to grow as a couple? How would we always love and honour one another even through the shitty tough times? They were hard questions, all of which were tackled head on and with love – always.

As all of that was happening, some beautiful wedding plans started to unveil themselves. It was, as my mum said it would, happening divinely. The marriage was the focus and the wedding started to be planned around that.

Then the moment came. We flew to Bali with some of our best friends for a quick holiday knowing secretly in our hearts we had followed our hearts to a place that made us both feel happy and that was the place, on that holiday , we made the decision to marry in Bali.

The day we made the decision, we went to a beach front bar at sunset with our friends, 3 of our favourite things– the beach, friends & sunsets – and did something I believe to be most critical when about to embark on planning a wedding.

We made vows to one another of how to conduct ourselves leading in to the wedding.

Yep. Vows.

We went to the beach, as the sun was setting, and made promises to one another about our intentions for not just the wedding, but promises on how we would feel and act throughout the process – and WHY.

We vowed the process would be a stress free, happy, argument free process. We discussed this was promised because any argument in the planning process was an opposing feeling to the WHOLE point of the wedding which was…Love and togetherness.

We vowed that in the moment of stress or an argument arising, we would stop, and remember WHY in the first place we were getting married. Because we loved each other. Because we were saying we wanted each other for this lifetime (& hopefully the next). And that no matter what we would honour this promise.

We vowed that we each would play a part no matter how big or small in each decision. So it wasn’t ‘my’ day or ideas with him showing up.

*side note: at this very moment of writing this listening to music, our first dance song has just come on – latch, (acoustic version), Sam Smith – talk about tears!!

We vowed that the wedding planning process would be as beautiful and fun as the wedding itself. That every decision, dollar spent and moment surrounding the wedding would have an intention of love. Every single aspect of everything was from love, with love or involved love.

Vows before vows I hear you ask? It might sound a little odd, silly, even lame perhaps (only if you’re a guy!) .. but I know, not even think, I KNOW it was THOSE vows that made our whole wedding so divine and loved filled. The Vows we made we took very seriously, we looked at it like if we couldn’t honour these vows to one another what would that say about the vows we were going to promise to each other on the big day?

The moment was captured by said best friends – and we all had a toast to the big day that was from that day forward going to be planned.

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And so the planning began. Vows were upheld. Love was poured in to every thought, every purchase, every idea, every moment…and what eventuated is what I know to be our love soaked wedding.

The first test came with what I believe is every engaged couples test. The wedding guest list. Morgan & I’s emotion behind the whole wedding was there wasn’t to be an ounce of tokenism, so that absolutely extended to the guest list. I know some might debate us until they’re blue in the face calling us liars, but our guest list was the first easy task we tackled without so much as a hiccup of disagreement. Here is why. We discussed HOW and WHY people would be invited to the most important day of our lives. We came up with a ‘caveat’ of areas people had to ‘fit in to’ to receive an invite – they never knew this but it was our huge way of declaring how much they truly meant to us and why we truly wanted them there. The ‘caveats’ were the following;

  1. Who, in our most desperate times of need, when we were questioning our marriage or selves would we go to first to remind us of our vows we took to one another on our day. I.e. who were the ones we knew we honoured and loved the most and honoured & loved us back who would hold us accountable to our vows.
  2. Who would we want to spend our New Years with? Morgan & I are only semi superstitious (ehem; I’m super superstitious) but one of the things we both hold true is that how we bring in our new years is a reflection of the year ahead – so it’s never WHAT we do, but WHO we spend it with. So this was huge in our decision making.
  3. Who would we want to call immediately when we knew we were pregnant? Who would share in that precious gift of knowing before the rest of the world knew? (aka before facebook)

And thus the guest list was formed. The beautiful thing about it, was that there was so much love & intamicy poured in to the guest list that we had no stresses or arguments over who should come because no matter who’s side or friends ALL had to fit the caveat so it was all love.

Now. Were there moments of arguments? No. Frustration? Almost. Of course there were conversations more intense, like me trying to explain to Morgan what a bonbonairre was and how it wasn’t a waste of money and no darling we ARE meant to give gifts to our guests. But here is what happened because of our vows. I respectfully listened and loved him where he was at on that opinion and we actually came up instead with the best idea for bonbarinners ever (if I do say so myself) … I went and bought quote cards from Kiki K (which just by the way happened to be in our wedding colours! White & Gold) and on the back of every.single.one wrote to every single one of our guests individually a love soaked letter from us. What they meant to us, thanked them for being them & playing a pivotal role in our lives and why they’re amazing. THAT was their bonbairnaire, that truly only stemmed from trying to think outside the box and make it more thoughtful and honouring Morgans opinion of even having a gift. When I rang him with that idea he was blown away. He said it was beautiful, he loved it and was proud of me.

I give that example as a way to show of course there were “disagreements” – but honouring the vows of not getting in to arguments or stress – we ended up coming up with even more beautiful thoughtful ideas.

Everything was love. Everything had intention.

And please don’t think I’m ignoring one of the biggest stressors that can come from planning a wedding – money. Planning your dream wedding of course can have it’s financial stresses, and I was conscious throughout the planning process that Morgan & I were incredibly blessed to not have any of those kind of stresses. We paid for the wedding ourselves with ease…. But let me just honour US for a moment and say we could do that because we made a smart decision 18 months before the wedding to take control of our future. It wasn’t luck, or parents or debt. It was through choices we made to work hard on a business where we can create financial freedom – which we did. A choice you can make to so I won’t ever ever hear “it was easy for them” .. ever. It can be easy for you to.

So here we are. About to delve in to the next 6 parts of our wedding that I want to intimately share with you, beautiful reader. But before I ever did that I truly wanted you to first understand WHY I know in my heart and soul it was the most magical divine day of our lives – because of this key piece of love & intention.

It was our intention to love through the whole process.

It was our intention to focus on the marriage after the one day that was our wedding.

It was our intention to create the most beautiful space for not just us, but our beautiful guests to experience our love for one very very special day.

But above all, it was our intention to create a beautiful life and love AFTER the wedding. Something we knew that if wasn’t the main focus going IN TO to the wedding, certainly wouldn’t be AFTER the wedding.

It is that same intention I hope for you too to focus on whenever it is your turn to experience the most magical divine day of your lives.

I hope the next 6 posts bringing every detail of our magical day bring you as much love and joy as we had experiencing them.

And here is to leading and living a life full of LOVING intention, always.

With all my love,

Anna

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